How To Make Peace With The Future | Alyssa J Freitas: How To Make Peace With The Future

December 20, 2017

How To Make Peace With The Future

If there's one thing I know in life, it's that the future is uncertain. There are no guarantees, no promises, and if you make a plan, it will almost certainly change. Despite knowing all of this, it doesn't alter the fact that the future is scary and uncertainty is hard to make peace with. I cannot claim to be an expert in this at all, but I have been working on becoming comfortable with change (my mantra for 2017 is growth comes from discomfort). Now that it's the end of the year, I thought it would be a good time to give an update on what I've learned and how you can make peace when the future is uncertain.

Click to read now or pin to save for later! The future is uncertain, but we don't need to live in fear. Here is how you can make peace when the future is uncertain and embrace the unknown
I love to create disclaimers in my mind. I love to make contingency plans and convince myself that I won't be too upset if x, y, or z doesn't work out because I knew that was probably going to happen anyway. It's a way for me to protect future Alyssa's feelings. It gives me a sense of control because I know that there's an alternative in place. However, I learned that there are things that are completely outside of your control. That no matter how much you try to convince yourself, you can't always do something about it.

You may remember that I posted about chronic illness a little while back, and it's still something that is on my mind and in my heart daily. There's a limit to how much you can do and the choice is to either fall into a pit of despair and spend all of your time on the internet finding out what could also be wrong with you (still hard to stop myself from doing that) or to acknowledge that this is what you are experiencing and that thinking about it nonstop won't change the situation and to make peace.

How do we make peace? How do we get ourselves out of the cycle of wondering if we will always feel this way or if heartache is in store for us in the future? These are the two key ways I have learned to settle my heart when the future is uncertain.

Perspective, perspective, perspective

If I've said it once, I've said it a hundred times: how you feel about your life is dictated by your perspective. Those who can be appreciative and grateful for what they have, and view what they can achieve in life as unlimited will be the happiest and most at peace in the present moment.

Take heart in the fact that everything changes

Yes, it means that some wonderful things we experience now won't always be there. But it also means that we will experience joys in the future that we can't even imagine now. Also, change happens to everyone. Absolutely everyone. For a longer post on the topic of change, click here. Just remember that it's not change we fear, it's the uncertainty of what the future holds. It's hard to remember this on a daily basis, but the important part is that you do remember. That you remember that your future is not something to be feared, but something that you must embrace as it comes. 

Here are a few actionable suggestions for when you need to reflect and reset your mindset:
  • Journal. This is by far my favorite way to lay out what I'm thinking and figure out where I may need to shift my mind. Check out posts on journaling here and here.
  • Yoga. While I am not into meditation (I took a mediation class in college and couldn't stand sitting still with nothing to do), I do like the singular focus that yoga promotes. Here are free yoga resources and adaptive yoga resources.
  • Blog/insert hobby of choice here/focus on something else. Although it may seem counterintuitive, sometimes you need to take a step back from whatever you're dwelling on and focus on something external to gain perspective.
As we head into 2018, let's make a commitment to make peace with our future and approach the new year with an attitude of abundance. 

How do you feel about the future? How do you ensure that you are positive and maintain perspective when things are tough?

-AJF
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